Jill Ethier

What Clutter does to YOU

A lot of people are talking about clutter right now because of Marie Kondo’s new series on Netflix (I’ve read the book years ago but haven’t seen the series because we don’t have Netflix…less TV options means more reading, fun and work time at my house).

I’ve been teaching and training about clutter for 13 years now and I wanted to share my thoughts on clutter and what to do about it in a very simple way.

Here’s the deal with clutter:

Clutter holds you back.
Clutter makes you feel less in control.
Clutter creates communication issues.
Clutter impacts not only your physical body but your mental and spiritual energy as well.

And from a Feng Shui perspective, wherever your home is most cluttered it directly impacts that area of your life.

In this episode of Ninja Jill KNOWS, I get real about the impact of clutter in your life and what you can choose to do about it. I have a simple strategy that will help you change your clutter situation and free up your life from your cluttered ways.

Listen in to find out what it is! 

There is a FREE Clutter Clearing video series that I created for you as well. Check it out here!

Create the life you desire most,

Jill

What a difference a year makes

I’m celebrating a birthday here today at my house. No, it’s not my birthday yet (that happens in early March), it’s not one of my girl’s birthdays….it’s my book’s birthday.

Yep, When the Meaning is Lost is one year old today.

(If you haven’t read it yet, I would love it if you did. If you have and it impacted you, I would love for you to post a review on Amazon. Click here.)

I can vividly remember how I was feeling a year ago when I hopped onto my computer and I searched Amazon for my book. There it was. I was more terrified than proud. My mind swirled with the possibilities of getting bad reviews, of the book offending people, of me realizing that I couldn’t really write…you name it, I was probably thinking about it.

At that point, a few close friends had read and reviewed it for me but that was it. My own family hadn’t even read it yet. As the reviews came in, I realized that it was going to be okay. The book was creating the impact that I had hoped for. Publishing it wasn’t a terrible idea.

I had never thought I would be an author. There’s a lot of things actually that have happened in my life that I never thought would happen (as I am sure you can relate to as well). I felt called to write this book. I fought my intuition and the calling for as long as I could until it was time to give in and get to writing.

A year later on this book’s birthday, I realize that it was all worth it. I have received so many messages of how the book has helped people move through their loss, the tough times in life and have hope again.

But most importantly, I can celebrate the fact that I did it and now I know how much more I am capable of. I know that the risk was worth it. I know that the hours writing and editing were put to good use. And I know, that heeding the call is ALWAYS a good idea.

What a difference a year makes.

This book has inspired me to want to share your story. I want to share the stories of 100 women in 2019 and I am creating a book series to do just that. If you have a story to share about overcoming something, creating more of what you wanted in your life against all odds or a story that will inspire others to live more fully, I NEED IT! Click here for more info! (And please, pass this on to anyone you know who has a story to share.)

While this post seems to be about my book’s birthday, it is really about something bigger…

It is about encouraging you to go after that dream and make it a reality. 

It is encouraging to listen to the call and take the action. 

It is encouraging you to do it even if you are terrified. 

It will be worth it in the end. And a year from now, like me, you will be so glad that you did!

Remember you are here to create the life that you desire most,

Jill

Maintaining your Energy during the Holiday Season

How’s you energy?

I’m serious…how are you feeling?

We are in it…you know what it is…holiday season.

And while it is a time of joy and laughter and parties and festivities, it is also a time when there is added stressors that begin to affect our personal energy, how we are feeling and how much we accomplish in our day.

The key to an enjoyable holiday season is to maintain your energy mentally, physically and spiritually.

I share how to do just this in one of my latest episodes of my podcast Ninja Jill KNOWS. I encourage you to take a listen.

Episode 220: Maintaining your energy during the holidays

One of the other ways that I maintain my energy level daily is with my morning routine. It consists of moving my body with some yoga, connecting within through meditation and reading to strengthen my mindset. This simple routine gets me centered and ready for my day. It fuels me mentally, physically and spiritually and it is vital during a time, like the holidays, when there is more to do and more things that can drain my energy.

I share more of my morning routine in a Facebook live that I did with Karen Osburn who also shares her routine and its importance in her day. Click here to watch what we have to say about how our routines increase our energy, improve our productivity and impact our relationships.

During this holiday season be sure to create space daily to refuel mentally, physically and spiritually. This will allow you to have more fun, enjoy these precious moments and make more memories during this special time.

Live your life with purpose,

Jill

What’s happening around you?

This week so far has had a weird vibe to it.

There’s lots to do which is normal but things seem to be falling apart around me or becoming more challenging with each passing day.

Today, I took stock of what was happening energetically not only around me but more importantly with me.

This week…

The vacuum has decided to only work for 60 seconds at a time.

The dandelions I’ve been working so hard at getting rid of have reared an attack of greater proportion.

The tree that I planted last week is trying to die.

And this morning on my way into the city, one of my tires was pretty much flat.

None of these things are huge but on top of an already full week, it can create more stress and intensity and some feelings of frenzy and not being able to get it all done.

I was beginning to feel the pressure today, so I stopped for a moment and I asked myself this:

What does it all mean energetically when I look at how I am feeling…

No matter how much I am trying to keep up, it’s not working (like the vacuum).

The busywork and the menial tasks have overtaken my personal work time on my purpose and passions (like the dandelions are taking at the acreage).

I am starting to feel weaker, get tired and my energy is leaking faster than I can fill it up (like the tree and the tire).

So, late this morning, I stopped and I took a few deep breaths. I performed a fire and earth space clearing in my home and I committed to slowing down the energy.

Just like the external events have been spiraling this week, so has my personal energy.

But, I’m in charge of the energy and how it appears and how I’m impacted by it. So, I consciously chose to slow it all down.

By doing this, the pressure released, my energy felt lighter and I created space for the things that I feel called to do to fulfill my purpose. The rest of it will still get done but it doesn’t hold as much energetic pull as it did.

So, take a look at your life. How is your external environment mirroring your internal energy experience right now?

What needs to shift and change?

Remember, you create each day and your experience of it. You are in charge of the energy.

You just have to choose to be.

What I learned about living after my baby died

On June 14, 2006 my whole world changed. It is the day that my baby died. Nothing prepares you for the loss of your child. What I thought I wanted no longer meant anything to me, how I thought my world would unfold was no longer accurate and what I felt I knew to be true was no longer relevant.

As I walked through the grief and the void that is created when you lose someone unexpectedly, I learned a lot about myself, what I truly wanted and what living fully actually meant.

Here’s what I learned:

1. Life is now

Stop waiting.

Your life is happening right now and while you have all of these dreams, desires and goals only some of them are being focused on and getting done. The others are in the “someday” file waiting for the perfect time or whatever you’ve convinced yourself of as a good enough reason to wait.

You don’t actually know how much time you will have to live this life of yours. You also don’t know what might happen next in your life to change everything. The only time you know you have is right now. Are you using it to create more of what you want?

When my baby died, I made a decision as I held her lifeless body to live as fully as I could each day.

I committed to only doing things that mattered to me, to take the leap of faith on a new project, to step outside my comfort zone and to go after what I wanted most.

I promised to make my dreams a reality now and not wait anymore.

I made the promise to honor her short life by continuing to live.

I decided that this devastating loss wouldn’t stop me but it would propel me forward and that I would live as fully as I could.

Stop waiting because life isn’t waiting for you.

Start doing it. Take action towards what you want. Be brave and go for it.

You have to choose how you will live right now. You have to decide how much the past will impact you and what you choose to do right now is what shapes your future.

Your life is happening now.

If you have experienced a loss, know that while the way may not seem clear, you just need to keep putting one foot in front of the other. They didn’t die so you wouldn’t live.

Your life will be totally different now but it needs to continue on.

2. I know what joy actually is

It took the experience of deep grief and sorrow to understand what joy feels like.

I took advantage of joy before.

I didn’t relish in it like I should have.

I didn’t realize that it could be fleeting.

I didn’t seek it out.

I also didn’t understand what deep grief meant. I didn’t understand how consuming it was and I didn’t understand that it was a different experience for each person and that it knew no timeline or specific way to experience it. I also didn’t know that it never truly goes away.

I didn’t know sorrow until that day my baby died almost 12 years ago and the days that followed. And in the depths of my despair, I began to understand joy.

Now…

I appreciate joy more.

I see it more.

I focus on it when it arrives.

And, I strive to create it.

Joy in my life is easier to come by now too because I choose it.

Joy can be found in small and big ways. You get to choose it.

3. Living is putting one foot in front of the other

I made a commitment on the day my baby died that I would keep consciously choosing to live each day.

I knew that my life could spiral into something even more unrecognizable if I didn’t have a purpose and a focus for each day. I knew that the void would consume me if I let it. So, I made a conscious choice not to let it in any further.

The day after she died, I woke up and I put on makeup and did my hair. Not because I felt like it but because I knew I needed to choose to live and that was part of living for me. The next thing I had to do that day was tell my 7 year old daughter that her sister had died. I remember every detail of that morning but the rest of the day became a haze.

Choosing to live and to keep moving forward saved me in my journey of grief.

It kept my head above water and out of the depths of despair and the shackles of grief.

I knew that I needed to lead my daughter and my family through this experience and it was that focus that kept me making choices daily to find a way to move through this. It kept me putting one foot in front of the other.

Life was going to happen one way or another but I needed to decide how I would walk through the grief, the void and create meaning once again.

4. The gap doesn’t get filled

There is not enough time.

There is not enough experiences.

There is not anybody that will fill the gap of your loss.

I’ve had two beautiful daughters since my baby died and neither one of them replaced her or filled the gap. They made my life better and more amazing but that gap doesn’t get filled in with the next person. There is no replacing her.

It is something that is a part of you. The gap eventually isn’t raw like it had been for months and months, even years but it is still there. It becomes the scar on your heart that you will carry forever.

I carry that scar and that pain on a daily basis. It’s not as palpable now and I choose to use it to drive me forward to fulfill my purpose and that pain has shown me what I am capable of.

Time doesn’t heal all wounds it just lessens the blow.

5. What you focus on changes

As I journeyed through the days after my baby’s death, I realized that all of the trivial crap of life didn’t need my attention anymore and didn’t deserve my time, energy or effort.

It drains you of your energy.

I didn’t worry about that stuff anymore; I didn’t “sweat the small stuff” because I’d been through something so big. And even over 11 years later, I still don’t get caught up in the small stuff.

This experience gave me perspective of what matters most and what will garner my attention, my focus and my energy on a daily basis.

If it can be simple, keep it simple.

Don’t make it more than it is.

Ignore the crap and carry on.

You have better stuff to do with your time.

6. There is only one way out of the void

And that is to…

Rise.

Live to honor them.

Create meaning again.

Ultimately, you have to continue to choose to live. And meaning comes through movement.

7. You only have one chance at this thing called life

This is it (in this lifetime at least).

I had a hardcore awakening at 29 years old when my baby died about the meaning of life and what we are here for.

I got reminded again a few years ago when I got very sick and my quality of life rapidly dissipated and it propelled me to share my story, to encourage others to live fully and to go after my biggest dreams, desires and goals.

I’ve helped hundreds of clients so far to live with purpose, I’ve created numerous online programs, I am sharing powerful messages weekly in my podcast and I have finally published my first book.

I am CONSCIOUSLY living this thing called life.

That’s the only way we should ALL be doing it.

I realized that this is my one chance and I might as well use it to go after my dreams, my desires and my goals.

There is nothing to lose and everything to gain. And “failures” and hard experiences are just part of the journey. They aren’t a setback, they are meant to redirect you.

My baby dying made my life more meaningful. It took me along time to admit that and to say it out loud.

She changed me in a way that wouldn’t have happened if she had lived.

Do I wish she was here with me. Of course I do. But I had to accept the reality that she wasn’t and I had to choose what I was going to do about it.

I chose to live my life as fully as I could.

You have one chance to live fully. Are you doing it?

Live with purpose,

Jill

If you have been through or are going through a loss or significant change in your life, I encourage you to check out my latest book When the Meaning is Lost available on Amazon. It is all about moving through the grief, the void and recreating meaning in your life once again.

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